** Lol please know that this was written in jest and is mostly for my own lazy ass when I don’t feel like working out and need motivation. ***
To the lazy bitch who doesn’t wanna workout,
So you don’t want to work out today, huh? Why not, girl? Seriously, unless you are gravely ill or injured there really is no acceptable excuse. Ok fine. I’ll humor you.
You had a long day and you’re tired. I’m not impressed. Take a quick nap and exercise. You don’t have to do a whole intense hour long workout but DO SOMETHING.
There are surgeons out there who stand on their feet for 24 hours straight in surgery to save lives! Don’t you think they are tired?? They are tired af and are still staying alert and doing what they need to do. Boss up, girl! Do what you need to do to stay in shape. Be the SURGEON OF YOUR OWN LIFE.
Unless you literally can’t stand from your exhaustion, you need to carve out some time for a quick workout. If you have time to scroll on Instagram or watch Netflix, you aren’t that tired, child. Do some crunches while you are watching TV. Do 10 pushups every time you see a girl in a crop top on Insta.
Yea, I’m serious. I don’t care that you are tired. Work out, bitch.
Next caller, please….
You are just way too busy to exercise. No time!
How much do I wanna bet that you spent a good amount of time mindlessly scrolling on your phone today? Or just procrastinating the things you have to do so of course you run out of time to do everything you need to do!
Just another sorry excuse. We prioritize the things that are most important to us and NEWSFLASH your health and your body should be high on that list!
I know if you actually try you’ll find some time in your day to get a quick workout in so don’t feed me bullshit!
Thank you, come again! Next in line!
You’ve actually been working out so now you’re sore and don’t wanna workout.
Are you kidding??? No pain no gain, baby. PUSH THROUGH. Women literally push babies out of their vaginas. Have you seen those things?? 8 pound turkeys coming right on out of us. And some do it with no pain medication. My God. You can work out when you’re sore.
Lol a sore muscle will NOT become more sore from use. It is better to keep moving a sore muscle because it actually makes it better!
Obvi, we aren’t trying to seriously injure ourselves here. Work out a muscle group that is not sore, do some light cardio or literally just walk. Just get your body moving and burn some calories.
Don’t break your workout streak!! Keep going because that’s the only way you are going to see results.
Still not feeling motivated? One more question.
Did you eat shitty food today? Chips? Candy? Fast Food?
Did you promise yourself that you’d workout to burn off the calories?
SO… I DON’T WANNA HEAR YOUR EXCUSES
You knew exactly what you were doing. You did the crime now do the time. You know I love McDonald’s as much as the next person but you gotta burn that shit off.
Look at your stomach. You want it to be fatter? You wanna her to be Tina the talking tummy?? Lmao GIRL, stop playing around and go some cardio.
Now to all of you…
Quit it with the excuses. Do what you need to do. Your body and health will thank you when you’re looking sexy af in that bathing suit. Future you will thank you for putting in the work even when you didn’t want to.
When motivation isn’t there, discipline has to show up.
What the hell are you still doing here? Get to work!