Hey girl! Are you feeling bad about being single? Wishing that you had a special guy in your life? Trust me, I get jealous sometimes too when I see cute couples strolling together hand in hand! Like why can’t that be me? 😫😫
I just have to remind myself that my time is coming! And yours is too! There are so many reasons why being single is the best and even necessary to find true happiness in the long run.
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Rushing into relationships just for the sake of being in a relationship is not okay and unhealthy.
In this day and age, so many people are on Tinder and Bumble just looking for someone to hook up with instead of forming a meaningful connection with intentions to commit. Guys don’t even ask you out of dates anymore! They ask if “you wanna hang.” What is that?? Lol
I wanna go back to the olden days where women were courted and wooed and it was sexy to show ankles. Well, maybe I don’t wanna go back that far but I definitely would love to see more romance and an emotional connection prioritized over a physical one. I can’t say that I haven’t fallen into hookup culture myself because I totally have!
Finding myself in 2 back to back friends with benefits situations is why I decided it is time to take a step back and learn to be happy on my own.
Don’t see someone out of a fear of being alone. Learn to embrace the single life!
You Learn to Be Happy on your Own
When you feel like you HAVE to have someone in your life to be happy, you are allowing someone else to dictate your happiness. So many reasons wrong with this thinking!
First, you are always going to feel depressed when you are single and like you are missing out. You are going to be desperate to get a special someone in your life even if they aren’t right for you.
You’ll tolerate more bullshit from a guy because you want him to stay in your life so you can stay “happy.” This notion that women need a man in their life is garbage. You can be completely happy on your own. A man in your life does not equal happiness. In my experience, they come along with a lot of headache and heartache lol! You do not NEED a man.
It is important to remember that you are responsible for making yourself happy.
Relationships should add to your happiness and fulfillment, not be your only source of it.
What excites you? What makes you happy dance? What are you passionate about?
What makes you feel content? Your job? Pets? Hobbies?
When you are responsible for your own happiness no one can take it away from you. You’ll be able to be content with or without someone in your life.
You Get to Figure Out Who You Are
When you are single, you get the time and space to figure out who you are without anyone influencing you.
A big part of my identity was being my ex’s girlfriend so when we broke up I was free-falling.
What did I actually like to do? Was I actually a homebody or did I just stay in because he liked to stay in?
Being single pretty much forces you to figure these questions and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
It is important that you have a strong sense of self so when you enter relationships you know who you are and won’t compromise yourself for the sake of your relationship.
Reflect on what makes you … you! What are your goals? Values? Beliefs? What are deal breakers for you in relationships? What are your passions?
Another part of this is to go out and experience life on your own! Don’t wait to have a partner to live life. Before we were trapped at home thanks to Corona, I was challenging myself to date myself.
I took myself to a movie that I wanted to see. I even bought a ticket to see Camila Cabello in concert and planned on going alone before it was canceled. Being single shouldn’t stop you from going to an event you wanna attend.
Date yourself when you are single and enjoy your own company. You’ll see that you are pretty damn awesome to be around!
You Don’t Have to Deal With Anyone’s Bullshit
Right now this is MY FAVE THING ABOUT BEING SINGLE lol.
It is so refreshing to not have to deal with any nonsense or drama or anxiety. I do miss getting good morning texts from someone but I don’t miss getting left on read for hours, arguments over stupid things and constant disappointment.
Last year, the guy I was seeing persuaded me for a week to let him take me to dinner on my birthday. Day of, I’m excitedly getting dressed when I get a text from him saying “Kay, sweetie, it is not going to happen tonight” With no further explanation!
Stuff like that really pisses me off and causes trust issues, y’know? I realized I need to stop dealing with these lame guys because they are effing me up for future relationships.
Being single you don’t have to answer to anyone, consider anyone’s feelings when you are going out with friends or deal with anyone’s lies or insecurities.
Really you get to be selfish and just think about you! Everyone should have that time in their life when they are free to do whatever the heck they please.
Don’t take this as all guys suck or anything. Cuz they don’t. There is always going to be some kind of issue with anyone you see. You just have to put up with bullshit from someone who makes it worth it.
Embrace being single, girl! When you find yourself trying to rush things, remember to be patient. The right guy will come along and when he does make sure you already love yourself as much as he will. It’s worth the wait.